WELLTHY Generation Podcast!

46. From Overweight to Body Builder: Shawnta Salazar's Story on Health, Motherhood, and Career

August 29, 2024 • Naihomy Jerez • Episode 46

Share episode

Send Naihomy a text message!

What if the key to wellness isn't just about the physical, but also the mental and emotional? Join us as we reconnect with Shawnta Salazar, a powerhouse Black woman from the Bronx who wears many hats: wife, mother, and dual C-suite professional. Shawnta opens up about her certifications in personal training, life coaching, and nutrition, and how her upbringing ignited her passion for health and wellness. From reminiscing about school days to her recent venture into bodybuilding, Shante’s story is a compelling testament to resilience and the power of community support.

Discover the pivotal moments that reshaped Shawnta's life, including the profound loss of her grandmother and the trials she faced during pregnancy. These experiences ignited her journey of self-discovery that led her to prioritize a healthier lifestyle. Shante shares the hardships of overcoming negative self-talk and trauma, and the transformative power of forgiveness and positivity. This episode sheds light on the complexity of balancing motherhood, personal health, and an ambitious career, and offers practical tips on how to involve children in fitness routines and maintain motivation amidst a packed schedule.

Shawnta's narrative also breaks down societal expectations, especially those imposed on women of color. She speaks candidly about the importance of rejecting the 'strong black woman' trope and seeking support. By embracing all facets of her identity, Shawnta demonstrates how investing in oneself through coaching and professional development can accelerate progress and help overcome limiting beliefs. Don't miss this enriching episode packed with valuable lessons on resilience, self-compassion, and the necessity of holistic wellness. Tune in to be inspired and empowered by Shawnta’s incredible journey.

About Shawnta
Shawnta Salazar is a personal trainer, health and wellness coach, owner of Uplift World Wide and full time COO at a NY non-profit . The best role she has is as a wife and mother to a 4 year old blessing . She has been a health and wellness activist for 20+ years. Shawnta focus on inspiring women of color to prioritize health and happiness mind, body and soul.

Connect with Shawnta
Instagram: Uplift_worldwide
Website: Uplift-worldwide.com

Thank you so much for listening!
Book a Consultation
Follow me on Instagram
Visit my website & sign up for my newsletter

Nai:

Hey friend, welcome back to the Wealthy Generation podcast that's W-E-L-L-T-H-Y. Today I have a guest on that I'm super excited to talk about, because we go way, way, way, way back. It is the way is back that has been on this podcast ever and it is a dear friend Shante from. We went to middle school together and then we went to high school together and we've reconnected through social media a few years back and I have been watching her wellness journey and her health journey on socials in the same way that she has followed mine, and I thought it was a great idea for her to come and speak to us. And before I let her introduce herself, I just want to share with her something that she probably doesn't know and it's something I still remember to this day, and it was when we were in middle school.

Nai:

I don't even know if you remember this, but we were in middle school and it was graduation year. We were going to high school and I was so sad and crying in the counselor's office because I did not get into the high school I wanted to go to where I knew some family members, and you came up to me and you were like but I'm going to the same high school as you. We'll be together and you were the only one that was going to the same high school as me and that made me feel better and we had an amazing four years of high school. Welcome, shante. Introduce yourself.

Shawnta:

I don't remember that, oh my God, but I'm glad that was the experience and not something else we did. I actually did not want to go to that school either, but I felt like at least we get, we can do this together. So hello, and I am so excited to be here as well. We do go way, way back, and I have watched your journey and I do want to say even though I know this is not a part of what I'm supposed to do is congratulations on all of your success. I truly believe you are an inspiration from stepping away from corporate embarking on this journey, showing other women of color how you can make this happen for yourselves. I am truly in awe of what you're doing, and so I'm really excited to be here and be a part of this process. I have listened to the podcast, some of the amazing guests, so thank you for having me. I'm actually really honored.

Nai:

Yes, welcome. So you know what I know. We, like I wrote up some questions. I'm like Chate, we're going to talk about these things, but can you share with us a little bit on why did you choose a wellness lifestyle? Like, first of all, if you can just explain for the people who don't know you and this is obviously like an audio show what your background is. And then, because I feel like that's very important for this kind of podcast, and I do have my guests describe themselves to their best fit, um, however they want to and then jump into, like, what made you decide to live a lifestyle rooted in wellness?

Shawnta:

yes, so I am Shante Salazar, formerly Shante Washington. So I'm married. I describe myself as a Black woman who is, you know, really focused on health and wellness, not only through my own journey, but supporting other individuals, mainly women, through their journey as well. But in addition to that, I am a mom of a four-year-old, a wife, so a family woman, and I actually and you just asked me about this my full-time career is a chief operating officer and a chief equity officer, so two C-suite titles for a not-for-profit agency in Brooklyn. But I also have my certification as a personal trainer, also a certification as a life coach. I'm pursuing a certification as a life coach. I'm pursuing a certification as a nutritionist. So a lot, a lot happening in my world right now. I was born and raised in the Bronx.

Nai:

I always represented the.

Shawnta:

Bronx, even though I live in Jersey now, but always representing the Bronx. So, you know, I like to share that piece because growing up in the Bronx I was, I did not see a lot of folks around me whether that was in my family or in my friend group that was focused on living a healthy lifestyle. You know, my parents did the best they could. We, you know, came from very meager beginnings. We had to, you know, rely on the government at some point in our lives and we did not have access to healthy options. So growing up I would consider myself a child who was overweight, but again, just lack of access really contributed to that. I was always an athlete, so I played basketball. I don't know if you remember Naomi.

Nai:

I do.

Shawnta:

I was the girl on the court every recess and all the other girls were jumping rope or doing something else and I was out there and I was playing basketball, mainly with the boys. There were some girls who played, so I was active, but I just really did not have the education, the information or the support and representation of folks around me to kind of tell me the things I was eating probably wasn't good for me. And then when you're a child in my culture it was you know, eat what you want, live your life. There was no real conversations around health. So that was, you know, really, what I, you know, grew up understanding and believing. So I'm going to pause there because I can go on and on, but I hope I answered the question about who I am. I also, I mean, I have so many things going on, but I will say that I recently started bodybuilding, so that's a big part of my life, right?

Shawnta:

now and it takes a lot of time, but I in January and I'll talk about that later but I became I started bodybuilding and competing in bigger competitions. So I am prepping right now for my third competition in Lodi, new Jersey. So that is obviously something that I did not know I would be doing, but I am loving right now. So, yeah, that's that's who I am.

Nai:

Wait, what made you go into bodybuilding? Like I'm just, I just really I'm so curious because that's like next, next, next level, y'all like like there's just processes and levels to being like living in a healthy lifestyle and this is definitely like a next level.

Shawnta:

It is a next level. Yeah, the words you're using is exactly where I was in January in my life. So last year I had a lot of epiphanies I'll say that and there were a few times in my life based on your question why did I decide on a healthy lifestyle? There was a few times in my life where things happen that made me reflect, open my eyes and think about what I wanted for myself, and so this particular journey really didn't have to do with my physique or my weight or looking a certain way. Interestingly enough, I feel like I look good. I worked out, you know, and I was doing, you know, things to ensure that I was healthy. I was eating healthy. What had a pull to me into wanting to compete was me realizing that I wanted to do more things for myself.

Shawnta:

And so, back up to a year and a half ago, my husband deployed and you know we had a two-year-old at the time and he left for a year. He was deployed stateside. Thank God, he was in Texas, but we still did not see each other every day, and through the course of that year and a half, I reflected and had a ton of epiphanies about Shantae, and one of those epiphanies, was making time to do things that I thought I couldn't do or I was scared to do. And this was one of those things. I, you know. I felt like I was strong, I felt like I could do it, but I was so afraid. I actually knew someone who competed and I was in awe of her and I kept telling myself that that's not something that I could do right, or that's not for me.

Shawnta:

And when that year and a half happened where I had to do everything right, I, you know, I was the sole provider for my son. I was still the COO in a company. I was running my own business, uplift Worldwide. I forgot to mention, yeah, uplift Worldwide is my company.

Shawnta:

I said to myself when my husband comes back, I'm going to start to prioritize the things that I have put off or have been afraid to do, because I realized that, you know, we don't control time. And I also realized that I have put in my started to put myself on the back burner after becoming a mom and a wife, and even though I worked out and I did all these things, there were things that I wanted to prove to myself as far as putting myself first or showing up for myself, as I mentioned in some posts that I shared a couple of weeks ago, is, you know, showing up for myself, as I mentioned in some posts that I shared a couple weeks ago, is showing up for myself. Was me proving to myself that I could do the thing, the hard things I could do, the things that I told myself I couldn't do.

Nai:

And so in January.

Shawnta:

I said you know what I'm going to figure out, how I'll become someone who can compete in this field. That was like the decision for me, and so I started to do research and I, you know, met someone, or I got connected with Fit Body Fusion, which is a big company that really sponsors these competitions, and I got a coach and I started to train and, beyond training, I learned a lot about my body and how it responds to weight training, how it responds to the way I eat, the things I eat. I also cut out a lot of processed food. I can't lie, even though I was into health and wellness. I was also very busy, right, and I was working and, you know, taking care of my child, so I would pop something in a microwave or, and this process has changed the way I approach how I eat my food, what I eat.

Shawnta:

I used to demonize carbs and knowing like knowing better, but still feeling like I eat so much carbs, and now like that's just a part of my everyday, like I'm eating rice, I'm eating potatoes, I'm, you know, eating complex carbs. So all of these things started to change for me and I think that's why I love bodybuilding. It wasn't. It wasn't the outcome of how my physique started to look, which is great it was. I really started to learn my body.

Shawnta:

And I was like my body needs this, my body responds to this, and that was exciting for me for sure.

Nai:

Yeah, that's such a wonderful story and I totally can relate where you were sharing about wanting to do something for yourself and kind of getting lost in being a wife and a mom, because that's kind of the root of how I started my wellness journey too, which is like way after when you started which we're going to get into in a second but I just kind of lost myself and and one of the things that I promised myself when I became a mom was I did not want to lose myself just in that Like I still wanted to be my own person too and look after myself. So, if you're a mom or not a mom, or if you're losing yourself to something else, listen up, because it is important to take care of ourselves. We're not like this even machine, like we try to compare ourselves to machines all the time, but machines even machines need like upkeeping, like you can't just run your car forever or whatever machine that you have without replacing something or giving us some sort of maintenance. So just think about that for a second. So this is where you are now and and and.

Nai:

Something else you said was learning how your body responds to food, and that is so key because everybody is so individual and there are certain rules that can benefit the vast majority of people, but the truth is that it might look different for you and this uh, one size fits all diets and lifestyles and all of that. It might not serve you and it's hurting you more than you think. So learning about yourself, what actually you are eating and how your body's responding to that, is one of the key pillars, at least in my opinion, to stay consistent and really make it health, a lifestyle, instead of just this cutesy thing that you do for like a few months or a few days Exactly.

Shawnta:

Right, would you agree? I agree, and it actually has made me a better coach as well.

Nai:

Look, at that, um, bring us back to the beginning. Like, this is where you are now. You're all the way in bodybuilding. But what was that moment for you where you were like, oh no, I have to make a change. Especially, obviously, we went to school together. We grew up around the same neighborhood, so I completely can relate to not like the accessibility of certain kinds of foods, what gets pushed on inner city kids, especially in the poorest borough in New York city, and what you have access to.

Nai:

And I still, to this day, remember being in the bodega in the corner from our high school and just seeing. I've always, I guess, been curious to see what people are eating and just seeing what what like our classmates were buying before starting school and it was like coke and Hershey bars and all of the candies from like the the little display in the front and the chips and the cakes. And for some reason I knew that was like. I intuitively knew that it wasn't okay, but I couldn't explain why. And if I ever bought something in the bodega, it would normally be like a roll with butter and I felt like that was a better option, which kind of was like from whatever else people were buying, I guess, but I was always so curious about that. So tell me, what was that moment for you that you were like no, I have to make different choices.

Shawnta:

Yeah, I mean I think there are a couple of moments in my life where I knew I had to make different choices, but one that I can think of that really was the start of me changing my lifestyle was my grandmother's passing. So my grandmother passed. I had to be about 18, 19. The dates elude me right now, but she had diabetes and you know just a lot of issues related to diabetes and other things. I loved my grandmother dearly. She partially raised me and I don't know. I had a moment where not only did I want to do something better for myself so I did not have similar outcomes but it was almost honoring her life, in a sense, where I knew better and it was like you know better, you do better. I knew that the things I was eating, the way I was living, was not going to be good for me in the long run, and so that was like one of the turning points in my life where I said I'm going to do something different for my grandmother.

Nai:

Yeah, how'd you know that I'm so curious, cause you're like 18, 19. I'm like, yeah, like I had to figure this out until I was 30.

Shawnta:

I don't know. I don't know, but I so I did it without education and knowledge. So the first thing I did was I'm not eating red meat anymore, right, and so I just cut out red meat, like completely, and I did that for 14 years, naomi, 14. So that was, like I know, red meat, I just in my mind, right. No research, no information, education.

Nai:

But it's things that they tell you too, like that's. That's like general typical advice that you might receive from a doctor when you go and there's something wrong with your health. So you probably heard that around somewhere.

Shawnta:

I was like no red meat, so pork, beef, any. Like you know, they say pork is the other white meat, but I cut out pork, I cut out beef and I just ate chicken and fish, and that was step one to me being on a healthier path. Um, also, I used to smoke um, not I used to smoke marijuana. Um, just to be transparent, and I stopped doing that as well. I don't think that necessarily related to my grandmother's issues, but I anything that I thought was unhealthy for me. I just wanted to like, do something different. I was young but I was, you know, engaging in drinking and stuff like that.

Nai:

So I did that dramatically.

Shawnta:

And I was in college, so you know trying to figure that out Exactly, exactly. And I was working at a gym in my school and college, alfred University, and so I started to work out. And so my friends and everyone was like what's going on with you? Because I started to work out, I started to eat differently, and I remember two of my friends thought I was starving myself because I wasn't being a glutton, like we would go to every store on campus, get all kinds of food, get these huge calzones, the calzones and you can't see this, the listeners can't see this, but it was literally bigger than my head. So we would eat these calzones and I was like I'm not doing that anymore. I'm not doing that anymore. And so that was the start. That was a shift for me.

Shawnta:

The challenge I can't lie, and this is a part of the journey that I talk about a lot is I was not at the point where I was ready to be consistent enough to love myself, point where I was ready to be consistent enough to love myself Right.

Shawnta:

And so, even though I had control, cause I started to change the way I ate and the way I lived and exercise, what I didn't have control of was the trauma that I've experienced in my life and not fully healing. And so what happened to me was, even though I, though I started on that path, my biggest Achilles heel was relationships, and relationships with, you know, intimate relationships. And I noticed that throughout my journey, when I would get into a relationship, I would not prioritize myself, I would not go to the gym, I would not eat healthy, I would, you know, I still wasn't eating red meat and things but I would eat what my partner ate or, and it was me doing the, you know, people pleasing kind of thing. And so there was like this yo-yo dieting phase for me, where I would be in a relationship and I, you know, wanted it to work and they, or a situation ship, as they say.

Nai:

It's complicated as Facebook back in the day to work and they or a situation ship, as they say.

Shawnta:

I wanted to work, and then it would. You know, I would just lose myself. Then that wouldn't work out and then I would like go hard in the gym again. Revenge body, you know what I mean. Like yeah, I'm going to focus on me, I'm going to focus on me and it. I went on that path for a few years. So when you asked me, what was that turning point? I had a turning point, but there were still a lot of bumps in the road and so to to really connect with listeners.

Shawnta:

I would say that is normal, right. Maybe it's not relationships, but I think a lot of people are really hard on themselves because they will successfully do what they need to do on their wellness journey and then sometimes they take a detour or sometimes, if you're, you know you lost weight and now you gain a few pounds back. We're so hard on ourselves and we are. We feel like we failed, but life happens, our bodies change, things change, we have children and, and so I was so hard on myself and I would always, like you know, have negative self-talk and really feel like I wasn't worthy even of, like, becoming a personal trainer and all those things. Because I was.

Shawnta:

You know, I was on a roller coaster at some points in my life. So there were other pivotal points where I wasn't on a roller coaster. But to your question, it was really when my grandmother passed, and there's a history in my family of diabetes, hypertension, um, you know different ailments that really, um, I think many of them could be prevented, um, if they the folks in my family had adopted a healthy lifestyle. Obesity is a big issue in my family as well.

Nai:

So yeah, I totally hear that and I do think. Thank you for like being so open and vulnerable and sharing like deeper parts of your story, because I do think that it can connect with a lot of people. And something that I've also noticed on this journey for myself and as a coach and helping many women is that our wellness is so intricately tied to our environment and our other traumas and how we want people to see us. And you have to grow a certain level of relentlessness to want to take care of yourself, no matter what other people think, and to stick to your choices and your decisions. And that's not easy because it's going against the flow of what, culturally, people have done, what people do in society, what we're taught is a way to have fun as an adult, or what you do to self-soothe or self or, you know, take care of yourself. And I have a episode on this podcast that I talk about.

Nai:

The hardest part of a health and wellness journey and it's your community is exactly that. Because there is so much feedback, there is a lot of pressure, especially when you start doing things differently than how you were before and you start making different choices, you go against the grain and it can be very hard to decide to just stick to what you're doing instead of just joining the peer pressure and the people pleasing, and I feel like that happens to everybody. And then there's this certain moment where you're like wait a second. Like every time this would happen to me, like every time I made a decision based on how somebody else would see me or what they would think of me, I was the one suffering and I was like, oh no, no, no, no. Like after the 10th time, I'm like wait a second, this is not worth it anymore. I'm over here struggling and like no, like I realized what it felt like to feel good in my own body and I was like wait, let me remember that. What do you think?

Shawnta:

Yeah, I agree with you 100%. I I had to realize what it felt. What it felt like to feel good in my own body, but also to feel good in my own mind. Also, to look at my own mind, I think that I think our minds can be our biggest, biggest hurdle, like overcoming the negative self-talk, because for me, I think that was the biggest thing.

Shawnta:

And even today right, it may not be as prominent, but as a mom, right, I take that role so seriously and I even struggled with being the mom who's doing all these things. Um, you know, my and my husband doesn't put any pressure on me, but he, his mom, was a stay at home mom. You know, essentially, essentially, my mom was a stay at home mom and I am the kind of person who is involved in a lot of things and that also attached to my identity. So that was really hard for me, right, being the mom who still prioritize going to the gym and working out, being the mom who still prioritize having friends and doing those things, being the mom who makes separate meals for herself, right, even that feels like, am I doing something wrong? Right, I am meal prepping and I have to, you know, figure things out, or my, my husband and I have to figure things out, um, but this is what I need to do for me.

Shawnta:

So all of those things still, I deal with, but I had to be, um, at a point in my life where I was okay with it and that people who are around me had to understand, and I also, you know, was vocal about the fact that maybe this is not a lifestyle that you agree with or you want for yourself, but this is what I want for myself and the people who I have around me now they support it, like you know, even if, you know, my family went to my first competition and they were like Shante is the only person that will have us at something like this, but, you know, with jokes, because it's like, but they know, like that that's who I am, and I think that I had to be okay with myself for others to be okay with me and not have to, like, conform to what I thought people wanted in terms of who I was. Yeah, so that was a big big part of, you know, just me coming into myself.

Nai:

Yeah, what? What started to shift your negative self-talk? Wow, Um.

Shawnta:

So there was a couple things I think, I think healing you know I've been doing a lot of healing over the years and also minimizing, comparing myself to others. I think that many of us naturally compare ourselves and then when you compare yourself, you start to tell yourself that you're not good enough, right, and you start to go down this shame spiral. And so I have been doing trauma training, not only for myself but the work that I do. Retreat, um, you know, you know Ruth, she did a retreat, a woman of value retreat a couple years ago that I went to and there was a piece in that retreat that really, um, changed a lot for me, which it was forgiving, you know, forgiveness, and I had to forgive my mom right in that space, because that that relationship was negative for a very long time because I held on to the trauma, and so that was a part of me letting go of a lot of negativity, which helped me really bring more positivity into my life, into my mind.

Shawnta:

So I don't think it was one thing, I think it was a process of understanding what was creating the negative around me, because the negative around you can also increase the negative self-talk that's happening within your mind Also being happy with my life. I think that we again with comparing. I can now look at social media, I can look at friends and I can be genuinely happy for them not compare myself to them and know that I'm on my own path and be really excited about my path, which it takes time to get to that place, but I'm at that place and that's really exciting. It creates this like peaceful aura for me.

Nai:

Yeah, I agree, that is so beautiful. No, seriously, you talk a lot about being a mom and I started my journey after I had my two kids. But I'm so curious to know how this process was for you, Because you started at such a young age. You had your son and then you went back. What did it look like for you, navigating all the changes that happened in pregnancy while maintaining your lifestyle lifestyle or maybe pausing and going back? Or however you handled it?

Shawnta:

Yeah, so I was fortunate. We bought our house and then I got pregnant, and the first thing I did when I bought my house was build a gym. So I was definitely fortunate to have access right I think that's really important when we think about that. So I knew for myself I had started my business. So in 2019, I started Uplift Worldwide. That was a big turning point in my life as well.

Shawnta:

Because I'm the kind of person is like when you put something out there, you got to do it right. I had put it out there that I was going to have this company Uplift Worldwide to focus on health and wellness. And I got pregnant and so I said to myself I started this business, I'm going to see this through. So I'm going to do this through pregnancy and I'm going to connect with women who are pregnant and who want to be healthy. And so I kept training I was doing. You know it was during the pandemic. I have a pandemic baby.

Shawnta:

So I had to pivot really quickly. The pandemic I have a pandemic baby, so I had to pivot really quickly and I, you know, did online training and, you know, really connected with the community of pregnant women out there and so I trained some women who were pregnant at the time. So that's what kept me going, to be honest. And then I had this baby, who is like my, the light of my life, and I, I was more motivated and that's, I know, for many people that's not typical, because we're tired, like let me not act like. I was more motivated and that's I know.

Shawnta:

For many people that's not typical, because we're tired, like let me not act, like I was just up and ready to get out all the time, because that wasn't the case and I had, uh, I know there's a lot of people who've had challenging pregnancies. My personal experience, I believe my pregnancy was very challenging. I had, I developed pregnancy onset asthma, I had congestion issues, it was hard breathing, like throughout the pregnancy, so it was really hard for me. Um, I had pain I, so I had a miscarriage before I had my son and so I was. I had pain, lower abdominal pain, pelvic pain, so I always was in fear of miscarrying and I remember like I would do some squats and I would be in pain and I, psychologically, I would like go into a space of like if I lose my baby it's my fault. So that was so. It was challenging, um, but I think it's like the perseverance right, it's okay, there's one more day.

Shawnta:

Let's see what I can do today. And then, when he was born, let's see what I can do today. And then, when he was born, I gained weight. I was at maybe 180 pounds and my average weight at that time was around 150. And I wanted to like stay healthy. I want to lose weight because I was eating. My favorite thing to eat was like beef patty with cheese. That was my craving. It was beef patty with cheese, shrimp and grits, and so I was like, all right, now we got it. We gotta get back to business. So I started working out with him. Um, I just had him, like you know, for the first seven months he was on my chest or you know, right there, and I would just do some workouts with him and that's what kept me motivated. And now he's four and he likes to work out with me for five minutes and then he'll go back to doing what he does.

Shawnta:

Yeah, exactly. But that, and now that motivates me even more because I'm sure I want to show him like a healthy lifestyle and what that looks like. He always says mommy, you eat healthy, right? And me and daddy we don't Like. Well, you and daddy need to eat healthy. So I try, me and daddy we don't like. Well, you're in, daddy needs to eat healthy. So I try to like, introduce him to healthy things. So he gave me a different reason Um, part of me didn't want to lose myself, but a part of me wanted to introduce him to um a world of health and wellness and and I know that he will internalize that and it will, you know, pay off at the end as something.

Nai:

Yeah, absolutely their core, core memories right on brand for wealthy generation podcasts. But I'm butch, I don't know how to make that sound effects anyway I hope you guys, oh god, um, but something you said was so key and this is what I always like to remind my clients with young kids and because they're like, oh my kid, they're around, I'm like just do it next to them, just like give them a little mat and give them like little play toys. They will get bored and they will leave like it's okay.

Nai:

And I would do the same thing. I went to five and below and they have these little one pound weights and I got some for them and I got like a little mat. I would lay it and, yeah, it might not be perfect, it might not look perfect, but you get, you're doing something, you're building a habit. You're sharing this time with your young kids. I know it's something that was not necessarily modeled for me as a child and it seems like it wasn't for you either. Something that was not necessarily modeled for me as a child and it seems like it wasn't for you either. So just you introducing that and moving your body and making it a priority, they will start to notice that and believe and start to create that lifestyle for them where they probably don't even need to do all this figuring out like we had to do. It's more like oh yeah, this is what you do. Like you go and exercise right, right and using them as a weight. That's an underestimated tactic. Like you have a 30 pound kid, squat that kid.

Shawnta:

they'll think yeah, and my kid was big he was big so he definitely was uh, some extra weight on me for a little strength training.

Nai:

So yeah, my kid, now he's 10 and he's like a whole 95 pounds. And he's like, mommy, can you squat with me? All right, boy, not hello. You're like 90 pounds. He's like, but don't you lift heavier than that. I'm like, yeah, but we're not doing that right now. Like now.

Shawnta:

I need a formal warm-up to squat you.

Nai:

Seriously oh my God.

Nai:

Yeah, they love that. So how have you been able to? I know you shared a little bit about like reintegrating when your husband came back, because obviously we like yes, as moms, we do need some sort of support or strategies to try and figure things out, and there's a gazillion ways to do it. It doesn't have to look a specific way, but how do you make it a priority? What do you tell yourself as like a double C-suite title a mom, a wife? To just stay on it, right because time is a big thing.

Shawnta:

That is a big question. That is a big question. So a couple of things I tell myself you're going to have good days and you're going to have bad days. Don't let the bad days deter you from your ultimate goals. And that is a really important one, because I recently have been having those moments where I feel stretched very thin. I teach classes at the Y, you know, I have personal training, clients and all these things, and I, so you're running a whole side business too.

Shawnta:

Yes, yes, yes. So that's why I have to tell myself that, right, there's going to be days where a client cancels. There will be days where I don't want to teach a class at the Y because I want to, you know, play with my kid or lay in bed, and I know I'm going to have those moments. I think what I would tell folks is prepare for those moments where the motivation is not there, where you feel like giving up. Prepare for those moments. The motivation is not there, where you feel like giving up. Prepare for those moments. Know they will happen. Tell yourself in those moments that it's a moment in time. You will get through this. You will get past it, because I've had to do that on numerous occasions. So that's one.

Shawnta:

I ask for help more than I ever did before. I asked for help more than I ever did before. I have also grown up with the strong black woman trope where you can do this, you can be strong, you don't need help, you don't need anyone watching your kid. So I we hired a babysitter to support, right, I'm coming from Brooklyn every day, most days. So having someone you know pick my son up when my husband is at work, um, asking my husband for help.

Shawnta:

There was a point in time where I felt like, no, exactly, I felt like he should know all the things I needed him to do. And I quickly and this is why, like, I think our marriage has been so successful is because I quickly learned that he's not a mind reader and as much as I want him to know like you know, kaiser likes to snack. You should go get it before you pick him up so he can be like he's not he. Sometimes he just that's not where his head is Right. And so, um, I just ask and I just tell him so even teaching the class of the why I felt so guilty about pursuing this opportunity because it's on a Saturday, it's nine o'clock in the morning, kaiser has swim class.

Shawnta:

It was all this stuff in my mind that I thought could not work. And I just had the conversation with him and he was like we'll make it work. And I was like, okay, we'll make it work, but those, I would tell you, five years ago I would have never had the conversation, because I would have felt like a burden, I would have felt like I'm putting a burden on him and it's not fair to him. And I just had the conversation and I was able to pursue something that I didn't think was possible. So I think to get to that point is asking for the support. You need not feel guilty about asking for that support, especially from your tribe, right, like if you know this is your tribe and they want you to win, you can go to them, they can support you. So that's how I've been able to do it and, very important, I know we're running out of time, but no, you're okay.

Shawnta:

This is okay. This year I told myself I am sick of being Shantae the COO, shantae the trainer. I said, whoever knows me, whether it's through work or through my training, they're going to get all of me, all of me. So I started to just integrate my life right, like I like my boss, who's the CEO of our company. I told her I'm like I'm bodybuilding now, right, and she actually came to my first show. I'm like I'm bodybuilding now right and so, and she actually came to my first show.

Shawnta:

I stopped hiding parts of myself and I don't know if it was shame, I don't know if it was like I'm not supposed to be doing this because I'm a COO Like this box. I put myself in several boxes. It was like the mom over here, the COO over here, the trainer over here, and I was like I don't want to be in all these boxes, I don't want to do this. You know, play this game where it's. I can only live my life this way in this box and this way in that box. So I opened myself up to just being all of these things right, I'm all the things and I'm I'm okay with that.

Shawnta:

And so to listeners I would say, many of us put ourselves in boxes, right, we are like the mom box looks like this, you know the the professional box looks like this, and I had to like break myself out of those boxes, be more authentic to who I was and be okay with that, and I think that has made me so much happier than I've ever been Um, because people understand and know all of me right, and they don't need to know everything about me and my deepest, darkest seas, but they know. Like Chante is a personal trainer but she's also a CO and she and she can do both of these things. She doesn't have to be one or the other Um and I'm leaning into that and I, I love that for myself for sure.

Nai:

So so good. I think the asking for help part is so good because there's this narrative out there about women being able to do it all and they're superheroes and they're, uh, no, unsubscribed. I'm sorry, I don't want to be no damn superhero.

Shawnta:

Everybody needs rest.

Nai:

And it just gets women of color specifically in trouble because we're already under resource. We already have this narrative. I grew up with a similar thing where, like I need to take care of my kids, I need to be responsible for every single chore and responsibility and nonsense in my home for every single chore and responsibility and nonsense in my home. And when we lean into that narrative it leaves a little space for rest. It leaves zeros, like very little space, or no space for doing things for ourselves, like going to the gym or preparing a good meal for ourselves, and then when we do, it's just so laced with shame and embarrassment. And then we do want to hide and we do want to put it in a box like oh my gosh, Lord forbid, somebody else takes care of your kid or you hire a housekeeper. This is coming for me in the future, or whatever you know, it's just that whole help part.

Nai:

And then if you do have a partner that's supportive, just the mind drama that we have to go through to even be like, hey, can you watch your own kid? Hello, is your kid too for an hour for me to go to the gym or do whatever. And we like breaking all these cultural expectations, these capitalistic like uh, norms that have been put around us so that we could just produce, and we are just so exhausted from life that we can't even think or be creative, like no, no, we're not doing that. And I'm so happy that you know you're such an example of this. I think that it's good to be so relatable, like we came from the same area. We came with different, like similar thoughts and values of growing up and what we should be doing and what we shouldn't be doing, and the lack of accessibility and all that. And I'm like, well, there's two of us here, there's probably more.

Nai:

And if they're not like it's possible for you to sometimes. Sometimes I think that there's just this veil that we can't just even see or think clearly, and then you're like one second you get to like come up for air and you're like wait a second, but what's happening?

Nai:

yeah right and yeah, people be putting us in a box and we don't even realize that I got called out on that too. They're like why are you putting us in a box? And we don't even realize that I got called out on that too. They're like why are you putting yourself in a box? I'm like, I'm so free I don't know what you're talking about and and this ability to just show who you are. I had a lot of shame and actually and I was really embarrassed to make a complete career switch and to just be fully myself as a health coach. I was so embarrassed and I think it was because of that. I was like oh my gosh, people are going to see me, people are going to notice what I'm doing. It was so embarrassing at first.

Shawnta:

So I can relate to that, because I think that I also grew up being told that, you know, be a lawyer, be a doctor, be the, be a this or that, the titles and that all matters. And you know, I still struggle with it, right, because I know I worked very hard to be a COO at a company and I almost wear that like a badge of honor. But it also is not fair to my passion for health and wellness, because it's almost like the shame, right. Oh, you were a COO and now you're what A health and wellness coach. But I mean, I have, I have bigger dreams than that, but it's, it's, it's in my own head, like no one has said that to me, but you feel like how can you go from this or doing this and being at corporate or being here and make that shift, and make that not only a lifestyle shift but a career shift?

Shawnta:

That has been very challenging as well and I will say I think it has, you know, made my business suffer a bit because I have to put so much energy into a nine to five in order to sustain that business. And you know, I would love to look into how I figure that out and navigate that because you know, now there's bills, there's this, there's mortgage, and so I've set myself up to kind of be in this, this box that I said I'm getting out of, and I think that's challenging as well, and I know we're not talking about career shifts, but I think it goes hand in hand with making changes. That really will be time, effort, energy. It could create a financial strain. It's similar to changing, you know, you go on this health and wellness journey. Really figure out what that looks like for you to be successful. It's, I think it's very difficult.

Nai:

Yeah, it definitely is challenging and we can chat about that over like we do. We do need to chat about that.

Shawnta:

We do definitely hear more. I definitely do.

Nai:

Yeah, so for women in our community community we grew up in the South Bronx, we went to South Bronx middle schools and high schools and all that and let's say they're around. Well, I'm in a discipline, well, they, everybody knows my age, so 38.

Shawnta:

Me too, girl 38.

Nai:

That you know there are peers, or they're older, younger and they're like man. If they did it, maybe I can do it too, but it's so overwhelming or I don't know where to start. What are some let's say three pieces of advice or action items, maybe that you can share, that somebody might be able to grab onto as a starting point?

Shawnta:

And this is for them starting their health and wellness journey, correct? Yeah, okay. Well, one piece of advice I would give someone is that you, you can make the time right. I know it feels like there is no time we time is limited and I get that but your health and wellness journey does not have to look like someone else's. So if you have 20 minutes to start in your day and that can be 20 minutes, minutes to walk, 20 minutes to exercise or 20 minutes to meal prep, right, it doesn't have to be all or nothing to start there, because just because you're not in the gym for an hour or you know, ordering factor meals to your door, does not mean that you won't progress in your journey and fall in love in your journey. But you can start somewhere and I encourage you to um, and not only well, I guess this is the second piece of advice, so I'll stop there, but um, not, try not to put so much focus on the scale or um, the look, and that can be trying to gain weight or lose weight.

Shawnta:

I think what we've learned, and also what I see as a trend, is that it's about your health, right, and the longevity of this journey, and so just starting to educate yourself and understand what your body needs, and beginning there and not weighing yourself every day or not feeling like you're not seeing the results you want to see could actually be more beneficial to you than you know.

Shawnta:

Being so prescriptive in wanting to hit a target and I know that goes against a lot of what people have been told or heard because, yes, if you are looking to lose weight, you do want to know how much you weigh, you do want to see if you're actually progressing in that goal but mentally right, mentally that can do something to you. That is actually counterproductive. So I would say just really focus on feeling good, feeling like your best self, waking up and knowing you moved a little bit more. Today, you made a choice that you typically don't make, right and like. Relish in those moments, because I promise you, those moments will be more beneficial in your journey than the moments of you know, opining and stressing over the fact that you didn't hit this specific weight target.

Shawnta:

Yeah, so that was two, yeah yeah, you didn't hit this specific weight target, yeah, so that was two and then three is honestly just positive self-talk, and I know that sounds so cliche, but when we get into that negative shame spiral many of us I won't speak for everyone many of us that negative shame spiral actually leads it's a domino effect, right? So an example of that is I'm never going to get there. This is pointless. I don't know why I'm wasting my time. I can be doing something else. The next domino effect is you know, what.

Shawnta:

I'm too old, I'm going to eat whatever, whatever I want, I don't have a body like them. It's genetics, it's all of the things that we're telling ourselves. I want you to take that one negative thing and take it and turn it into a positive thing. Right, and continue to add those positive mantras and things to what you're saying to yourself, because that will build confidence, that will build consistency, that will be the thing that makes you feel good enough to keep going. So you know again, these are things that you don't need to have a trainer teach you, right. These are things that you can work on yourself and, of course, I'm a personal trainer.

Shawnta:

So if you need support and I know that you said three, but if you need support, it's an investment, right, and I think working with a coach like Naomi is an investment investment. Working with someone like me is an investment and we make so many investments, right, we spend money on so many things. But if you want support and guidance and someone who help hold you accountable to the goals that you set for yourself, make that investment for yourself. I think it doesn't have to be forever, but it can be in the short term to get you started on that journey.

Nai:

Yeah, thank you so much for that. Let's wrap up on that note. Let's touch on investment a little bit more, because I know it was a big deal for me to start investing in myself. A big deal for me to start investing in myself and like, based on the way at least that I grew up, it wasn't like something you quote unquote spend your money on. But here we are at, like the dollar store, buying $50 worth of things or whatever, and I don't think that it's really spoken about or made really clear what the benefits are, especially in our community.

Nai:

I feel like in in, like the white community and all that like coaching is not new.

Nai:

Hiring some sort of support is not new, and I worked in corporate for 12 years before this and I learned about coaching right at the end and there was like there was like a wardrobe coach, a presentation coach, like an executive coach.

Nai:

There's all these coaches and I would look at these people and they were so amazing and I just thought that that's how they were, but in fact, they had like three coaches backing them up in specific areas where they felt like they needed support and then, in turn, that made them look like rock stars or superstars or however it is, and I myself have invested in business coaching and personal trainers, in about I can't even money coaches, like just a bunch, and they've really made a difference in my life, faster than if I was just to sit here and mope all day and night about all the negative self-talk that's in my head or all of the comparing that maybe I did, or maybe thinking that I wasn't good enough or it wasn't for me, or I just don't look like other people.

Nai:

So how has actually investing and putting money, maybe and it's maybe probably even shifting it right, like shifting it from spending it in one area that's not really serving you at the moment to another one, but the shame around it and it's like, oh my gosh, I cannot believe I'm going to spend X amount of money on a person to help me do X, y, z. But guess what? That person might be exactly what you need. They're culturally relevant, they know where you come from. They might know those negative self-talk that it's in your head because you're coming from a similar place and they can just really elevate you faster than you'll ever know. So what's your experience with that?

Shawnta:

Well, with hiring coaches I have probably always hired. I've had three or four coaches fitness coaches in my lifetime, even as I became a fitness coach Most recently, as I mentioned, I have started bodybuilding and hired a coach. It is pricey. I think that what I will say one thing you just said is really important, right? I track my budget. I look at what I spend my money on. I spend my money on a lot of frivolous things.

Shawnta:

A lot of things, a lot of clothes, a lot of things that don't serve me in terms of my goals and what I want in my life. So I had to make the decision, along with my husband, to reinvest those dollars into something that I felt was worth the investment. And so I think for folks who are really struggling with making a decision about investing in a coach, really looking at what you're spending your money on right Because we are when we get a sticker shock when we hear the amount that it might cost, but then we realize, wow, I've spent this in two weeks on these things that I probably didn't necessarily need and, trust me, I get it. Money does not grow on trees. We know that saying, and we know that everyone has a different financial situation. So I can't account for others' financial situation. But I will say, if you have the ability to look at your budget and make an investment, even if it's a small investment, also research right. There are different coaches who charge different amounts depending on what you want. So if my price or what I'm charging is not for you, then maybe I'm out to coach for you and that's okay. You can still look to see. Okay, is there other coaches out there for me that they're within my budget. So don't, you know, be afraid to do research and really look, get referrals, you know, ask folks and find out what's out there.

Shawnta:

I think the other piece is our mindset around what is a priority for us and what's not right, and shifting that mindset Cause, as you said, growing up, you don't spend money and it's it's this whole mentality of like less than right, I, we didn't have a lot, so we only spent money on the necessities, right, and the necessities were a roof over your head, food in your mouth, like that was the necessities, and that mentality is it's, you know. You know, I'm going to say it right, for many people it's cultural right. If you don't have access to a lot, if there are disparities in where you grew up and you know what you have access to, and now you have to, like you know, spread the dollar really thin, you are not thinking about hiring a coach, right? There are some other folks and other cultures who you know didn't have, don't have that same challenge.

Shawnta:

So I think, as we start to see generations and things shift, I think we need to get the message out there that it's okay to invest in coaching or support to get you to reach your goals or to get you to where you want to be, to support you, to hold you accountable. There are, there's a reason why coaching exists. There's a psychology behind it, right, there's a psychology behind why that support is actually, for some people, necessary for them to reach their goals. So, having those conversations and the other thing I will say is a lot of people feel like when you are starting a business or you have a business that you are trying to I don't know be shady and maybe that's not the best way to put it but it's like you're trying to sell a service.

Shawnta:

So I'm going to tell you, I hate being a salesperson, but being a salesperson is a part of having a business like this. Right, I serve customers. So people inherently feel like a salesperson is trying to get over on them and I never come. I never come to anyone like a salesperson, right, I? I don't force my services on you, but I think people have a negative connotation with someone like trying to offer a service that costs money.

Shawnta:

Um, but I think that narrative needs to change. Right, you are a coach and your services are to support the folks who need them and it just so happens to come with a price because your time is worth that. So, shifting that narrative around that. And the last thing I will say and I've been seeing this everywhere if someone is not willing to pay your fee, then they're not your customer. And I know that. You know that's probably not a popular, you know thought or belief, but I had to be open to that concept because I was always trying to give a discount. I was always like, oh, you can, I can take this off or I can do this, cause it's that mentality of like, oh, but I'm supposed to be, like the nonprofit mentality.

Nai:

Yeah.

Shawnta:

And I'm like you got to stop. This is a business and for your business to thrive, you, this is your price Right, and you know what you worth, cause you work damn hard Right To get to that point. So, and I know you know.

Nai:

Yeah, I know, and you've invested so much time, like what people don't see behind the scenes is how much time we have to put in for certifications and pay for those and just sharpening our skills and the time and all that. So it's really an energy exchange, right, and honestly, it's a way to hold yourself accountable too, because, trust me, I'm sure you've done things for free, and so have I and the commitment is just not there. It's that little saying you pay, you pay attention, and not all money is good money. So we're elevating as a community and this is part of it.

Nai:

We're not only elevating and being in like gorgeous C-suite positions, increasing our income. There's other parts of our holistic wellness that needs to come with us, like our wellness, like our mindset about money. It's us as a whole person, like you were mentioning before, because we're kind of be, we're kind of be, we're going to be a little bit disleveled. There's this word in spanish called chueco, where you kind of like one side is lopsided and it's like we can't be in growth lopsided, right, we work so hard in school and our careers and stuff like that.

Nai:

We also need to elevate other parts of ourselves. Because of now we're going to be so not balanced in our life. And with that. How can we support you? Shante, you're in New Jersey, you're by. You have what people need. I always love to refer people to personal trainers. I do a lot of nutrition and I lightly touch on fitness. But I'm like girl you need to get yourself somebody who can help you and look at you and look at how you're moving so you don't wreck yourself.

Shawnta:

Well, for sure, you can follow me on uplift underscore score worldwide. That is my Instagram account. You know I'm on TikTok as well. Uplift worldwide my Instagram account. Um, you know I'm on Tik TOK as well. Uplift worldwide. I do have a website, uplift dash worldwide um dot com, and I'm sure when we share the information about the podcast, we can share the links for you as well.

Shawnta:

So I'm very reachable, very available. I am going through a phase of figuring out what my next steps are with Uplift potentially rebranding, so please stay tuned for that. I still offer virtual personal training and personal training in person to Jersey, bergen County residents at this time. So if you're not in Jersey, I'm not doing it in person but virtual. I offer free classes. I do things on Instagram. So even if you're not looking for a personal trainer, but sometimes you want offer free classes, I do things on Instagram. So even if you're not looking for a personal trainer, but sometimes you want to hop into a class, follow me, and I also am starting or adding coaching to my business, so it's more like life coaching. Yes, and so that's the whole rebranding part. I'm working on my website so that's being updated, but would love to connect with anyone who is just looking for some support um for health and wellness and physical fitness. Thank you.

Nai:

Thank you, shante, for coming on being so vulnerable with us and sharing your story. I appreciate it, as I am sure the audience will as well. And let's keep going. Connect with Shante alle. All of her uh information is going to be linked in the show notes, and don't be shy to connect with her. Okay, I'll see y'all next week. Bye.