WELLTHY Generation Podcast!

82. Unfiltered Truth: From Curated to Letting it All Hang Out

• Naihomy Jerez • Episode 82

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This raw, unfiltered episode explores the challenges of maintaining a curated image while dealing with burnout, entrepreneurship struggles, and health issues. I share my personal journey of exhaustion and the pressure to appear put together even when everything feels like it's falling apart.

• Growing up conditioned to look presentable on the outside regardless of inner turmoil
• The physical toll of back-to-back health issues including COVID and unexpected infections
• Navigating the challenges of parenting a neurodivergent child while running a business
• The reality of small business ownership without a team to support during personal crises
• Learning to let go of perfectionism and allow myself grace during difficult seasons
• Finding safety in the process and trusting that creativity will return after rest
• The importance of building a foundation for sustainable wellness beyond quick fixes

If anything in this episode resonated with you, please reach out. I've opened up my three-month one-on-one food and hormone health coaching services until July 20th, designed to help you navigate weight, hormones, and cultural pressures with flexibility and compassion. Book a free consultation with the link in the show notes or send me a message to learn more.


Thank you so much for listening!


Speaker 1:

Hello friends, welcome back to Wealthy Generation Podcast W-E-L-L-T-H-Y. Wealthy and I'm kind of whispering. It's late at night, I'm in my bed in my bedroom and the windows are open. There's like cool breeze blowing in and it's also raining, because that's what NYC does now. It just rains for days and days and days and a week. Anyway, it actually feels kind of nice like this whole environment where I'm recording this in, and I also think it's very aligned and appropriate, because the truth is, this is a podcast.

Speaker 1:

Today's episode is of rawness, right, it's just truth, real, like you're my best friend that I'm just going to be super honest with or coach or anything like that about the real. Real. That's the kind of episode this is and this is what it feels like as I am recording it in this way. And I decided to record this episode like this and with this IES topic for a few reasons. Number one I have not been feeling fully energetic these past few weeks, like there's been a lot of emotion and it's been hard, and I'll get into it, but I'll just share the other two. The other one is I've been working with my healing coach and I sent her this seven minute voice note yesterday. So if you are a person who sends me voice note and you send me a seven a four minute voice note and you're like I'm so sorry, this is so long, it's not long. I love listening to long voice notes. I hope this feels like a long voice note and I send long ass voice notes. So, yeah, I think it's like a good medium between phone call and text, because it feels like you're having like a real time conversation, because you're hearing the other person's voice and I think, and you're hearing the other person's voice and I think, and and you're hearing all the nuances and all that, just as if it was a phone call, when sometimes we don't have time to just be on the phone. So, anyway, yes, number two is because I left my healer a seven minute voice note. I was just, I was telling her how, what was their word? I, how I was feeling so much resistance, right, and she was like how can you make things more fun for yourself? Like how can you just show up and and be seen and support other people in a way that is not so performative, right, and she's not saying I perform, but you'll understand. You'll understand what she means when I explain it in a bit. And then the third thing was in.

Speaker 1:

In alignment with all this, I posted a reel with where I remixed with michelle obama and michelle obama was talking about how hard it is to be a woman, or maybe I said that, maybe that's not what michelle said, and but she's talking about how women's research and care for women hasn't been taken seriously. That, um, all people care about is the fetus, but essentially, women's reproductive rights is the health and safety and life of the actual woman, and we are seen kind of as machines where all that matters is that we're able to reproduce children in our uterus and she's like. Our uterus does one of those things, which is create life, which is beautiful, but it also does a lot of other things and it's very important. But if men and society choose to view us as machines, then our machine needs to be working very well and it needs to be healthy and it needs to be, you know, efficient and all that. And I was saying how this country has not set up for our machine, aka uterus and reproductive organs, to be healthy and in good shape and able to do the job that it does, because this capitalistic society really does not give a shit they like it's really hard to be a healthy woman in a capitalistic world. It just is.

Speaker 1:

So my friend Camila re-shared this reel and you can go ahead and see the reel on my Instagram page if you wish, or I'll tag it here in the show notes. And then her next story she mentioned how I think she was talking about herself, but about showing up curated right, like we always, especially if we're running a business or something like that we always show up curated and she posted this beautiful slideshow or like slides about her life. Part of it like, yes, the nice curated pieces, and part of it the messy side and I thought to myself it really hit me, which I should actually tell her. I actually invited her to be on this podcast to talk about that topic, so stay tuned, um, and I was like wow, the part that exhausts me the most sometimes is that when I'm not feeling inspired to curate for my business, to post on Instagram, to write a newsletter, to create a podcast episode, anything like that, and I'm really overwhelmed with life and I have stuff going on, then it becomes extremely overwhelming.

Speaker 1:

And I feel like I'm really overwhelmed with life and I have stuff going on. Then it becomes extremely overwhelming and I feel like I'm not doing a good job and I'm failing at everything, so on and so forth, and I started to think about why do I show up like that? And it's from childhood, right? I grew up in a home where, no matter how things were on the inside, you always needed to look presentable on the outside right. No matter how you were feeling on the inside whether I was upset, angry, mad, frustrated didn't matter. I had to present like a good girl on the outside right. I had to smile, I had to be pleasant. I couldn't, you know, I basically did not want to embarrass my parents and I, and because and this is not throwing my parents under the bus, but it's just like my experience, right, what happened, you know and especially because I have a son who is on the spectrum, or I actually just said he's on the spectrum, but he hasn't been officially diagnosed. We are waiting to get a neuropsych eval for him anyway, but what I meant to say is that he's neurodivergent.

Speaker 1:

So there's another piece of my life that you probably did not know about that I've been, you know, handling for the past seven to eight months, right, so that if, if you work with neurodivergent people. If you're neurodivergent yourself, if you have with neurodivergent people, if you're neurodivergent yourself, if you have a neurodivergent child, it takes so, so, so, so, so much energy, especially when you're trying to literally fight and advocate for them in a system where it doesn't make it easy in school, with different resources, especially in school. It's hard and it takes a lot of energy. So anyway, back to this whole curation piece.

Speaker 1:

Like I needed to show up a certain way, I needed to present myself a certain way, emotionally, physically, with how I expressed emotions on my face, how I was dressed, and I remember one time I was leaving for a work trip. I was literally in my 20s, like super early 20s, and I had no makeup on, and I was fine with that, I didn't think anything of it, and my mom was like you're not gonna put anything on your face, like not even a little powder or something. And I thought to myself I'm like what's wrong with my face? Like I think it looks fine and I'm gonna go travel anyway. So that kind of stuff made me really self-conscious, even to this day. Sometimes I'm like, oh, I shouldn't leave my house. Oh, I shouldn't leave my house without makeup. I shouldn't leave my house without earrings, I shouldn't leave my house in sweats, I shouldn't do X, y, z right Like.

Speaker 1:

The way I present myself needs to be very put together, and what I recently learned was that striving to be really put together can also lead to burnout. So that happens to me physically, mentally, how I show up in my business a lot of times. I know a lot of the feedback I've received from my coaches and mentors is like show up as your full self because of this creation piece that happens right. So that is what I've been thinking a lot about, because in the past few weeks I've just been extremely tired, like especially starting in April. Right In April I sprained my ankle, I got COVID and I was like really sick for about two weeks and then just this past week I thought with a yeast infection that I have not had in like the last 17 years or so, so it's just really caught me off guard. I the last time okay, I'm 39, so 17 years ago has been a really long time. This time I do not remember being so freaking exhausted from my body fighting this kind of infection.

Speaker 1:

I went to the GYN yesterday to make sure everything's okay and to get appropriate medication and testing done right Blood work, and she did a pap smear and the whole nine A sonogram. Even I was very grateful that I found a doctor who had same day space, because y'all know that that doesn't really happen. They'd be telling you oh, come in two months and you're like fucking infested in fucking yeast by the time that that happens and you're trying to self-medicate and all this shit because you can't even get to see a specialist in a decent amount of time. Anyway, I digress. So I got hit with that physical stuff too and it has me so extremely exhausted. I thought that I could just keep living my life like regular do the creams, I go to the doctor and be all cutesy and keep going, and no, it has knocked me the fuck out. Just like energy wise, I've had to cancel my workouts and just take full on rest. Thankfully, my hub stepped in to take the kids to school because I could literally not get out of bed. I was so tired Anyway.

Speaker 1:

So I'm also trying to run a business here, right, and I don't have a full staff. I don't have the capacity a lot of times to go over here and batch things and batch podcasts and batch emails and batch Instagram posts. I work with one other person who I love so much and helps me so much my OBM Alexa, and that's about it, and she does so much for me. She supports me so much and helps me so much my OBM Alexa, and that's about it, and she does so much for me, she supports me so much. So we're both really busy. But it's moments like these where I can't show up. I don't have the energy or the capacity to show up like I usually do, to show up like I usually do, and also I'm worried about cash flow and revenue and my business slowing down and all of that. That makes it extremely stressful and hard to show up, because I'm just kind of tapped out. I dealt with burnout in April and physical illness, and here I am again in May, dealing with physical illness. Also, it's the end of the school year.

Speaker 1:

I have a fifth grader who's graduating. He has a lot of trips and I want to be present for him. It hit me that this might be the last time I chaperone trips with him and I'm that kind of involved in school with him, because he's going to middle school. And you know, these kids don't you're not cool, no more, they don't want to be hanging out with you. They don't want their mama coming on the field trip with them Anyway. So I've been trying to, you know, adjust my schedule, be there for him and then my younger one. It's been so much work, emotionally, physically, everything to get him support for his neurodivergence and I take him weekly to a therapy appointment. We have check-ins in school. There was a moment in time where I was receiving multiple emails or calls a week about him Multiple times a week going in person to school meetings.

Speaker 1:

So all of that takes a toll, while also trying to be creative. Creative, while my main job being to hold space for my lovely and beautiful clients which I love to do and trying to take care of myself and my home and the hubs, and it's just a lot. It's a lot. And for a long time I fought the fact that I take care of a lot because I just saw it as something I do Like I'm a mom. Of course I show up in this way, I'm running a business. Of course I show up in this way, but I did not really consider how tired I was and what kind of actual rest I needed and that it's okay to slow down, but the fact that I do have an extremely small business and this is my source of income and how I contribute to my family monetarily, then that was also a lot of added stress for me.

Speaker 1:

So it was this whole thing of like, how do I show up, what do I do, even though I've been doing this for five years, right, and this led me down this path of like voice note status podcast, because it just becomes so much to be so buttoned up and to curate things and to make sure I'm saying it the right way and to make sure I'm connecting with you, to make sure and like also kind of running this type of business of health and wellness in this kind of environment where there are resources like ozempic and things like that, where they're handing it out, and although I do think that they're an important tool, absolutely and you've heard me talk multiple times about that I feel like also people don't understand that they do need support in creating a lifestyle and a plan around that right. So I just think that there's been a shift and I'm trying to figure that out as to how to support my community and my people as the wellness landscape shifts, and that's an important lesson to me honestly, because it happens often. It's a billion, multi-billion billion B with a B B billion dollar industry, so of course, it's always changing and shifting and I am brand spanking new. Five years is nothing. So if I want to continue, it's something that I'm going to have to figure out. I'm assuming multiple times, but it doesn't take away from the fact that there is stress involved too, because, as much as I love just sharing information, doing all of that, there's an aspect of generating revenue that's also really important to run a business. So it makes it really difficult when and I worked in digital advertising, I worked with full on teams and it makes it difficult when you are the person for everything. Right, like, I need to be the creative one and I need to come up with marketing and I need to come up with supporting my clients and how am I going to create new leads and how am I going to?

Speaker 1:

So you know, I don't want to come off as complaining. That is not what I'm doing. I don't want to be a Debbie Downer and negative Naomi here. I'm just literally being so honest and raw as to what happens behind the scenes of entrepreneurship and when life happens, because a lot of people, people, a lot of entrepreneurs might not talk about this, but is the fucking truth, because I've been in multiple programs. I've been, I've, my peers are small business entrepreneurs and every single one, whether they want to talk about it or not, goes through these kinds of like and downs, worries, concerns, struggles in their business. And I'm just letting it all hang out here, right, because it's what's true and it's what I need to think about and consider. So doing this episode actually is very, almost relaxing and freeing, because I am letting it hang out, I'm not trying to curate it.

Speaker 1:

I did not have the capacity this week or in the past few weeks to create an episode where I'm giving tips and I'm giving advice and information, if anything, because I just couldn't. I don't have the mental, physical capacity to do that, because I am so tired. And this is often what happens in entrepreneurship where you just need to pivot. There's no other team member or team to handle whatever needs to happen. Things just need to slow down or look different, right? So, yeah, this is exactly what you're hearing right now.

Speaker 1:

And I even forgot what one through three was. I know that three was my friend, camila posting about curation and showing up curated. And then number one was about growing up. I believe, through that of how, like it kind of holds me back. I guess sometimes, when, when I'm trying to show up and when I cannot think of something that is super curated or, like you know, showing a businessy or however you want to see it online, then I stress about it and it gives me a really hard time. And then number two I don't even remember yo, I don't even remember what it was. That's the truth and honesty around it. And you know what? It's hard to show up messy, it's hard to show up not as I don't know. I don't know if y'all have an expectation of me or not, but I know I did growing up. So that still hangs on me.

Speaker 1:

And I remember not too long ago, like two weeks ago, I posted something um on my stories about going to um, the Dominican restaurant that I go to, and one of the waitresses saying like, oh, you're so beautiful. And I was like, oh, thanks, it's my makeup. And she's like, no, no, it's not your makeup, it's like how you show up your personality. You're always so positive and energetic and kind and all that, and normally that's how I usually am and love to be and how I give and present to people. But there are times, like this and this past week, where I'm just so exhausted and I am not. And I am not although I am kind to an extent I'm not as chipper and energetic and I don't have the right things to say and I cry and I worry and I feel disappointed and I feel a lot of resistance and I feel like giving up and I feel like I don't have any more to give. And what's the point of all this? Right? And I kind of have to.

Speaker 1:

I've been learning right to let myself be and process these emotions and not think that they're anything bad and learn how my body's communicating with me through how I feel physically. And I know I say this to my clients a lot like see how you feel physically, and it has a lot to do with food, but I'm learning how to do that in a deeper way. When it comes to spiritually right, I think it's different, like connecting with your soul and spiritually and with your intuition. I've been working a lot on that and I'm the type of person who have always put these emotions aside. I've been told by multiple coaches and mentors as well, that I tend to do that a lot, where I put my emotions aside.

Speaker 1:

I'm like, yeah, yeah, I feel tired, yeah, yeah, I feel resistance, but how do I make it end? How do I keep going? How do I make sure I'm back on my feet tomorrow? How do I make sure it doesn't last too long? And sometimes we can't do that. I can't do that. I just have to write it out. I just have to be human. I just have to find the trust and the safety in the process and know and trust that I'm going to come back and that I am going to be creative again and that people are going to hear my message and that I am going to connect with people and that there are people who still find this kind of work important and they want to do it. But if y'all haven't done mindset work before or tried to pep yourself up multiple times before, sometimes it just takes a little while and what I've learned is, I think, for the first time ever and I've not only learned, but I honored is actually letting things be and by be I mean myself like just being not doing everything that I'm supposed to do, because I'm supposed to do it, letting other people step in and help me.

Speaker 1:

That's out of routine, like today. I was supposed to take care, take the kids to school, instead of the hubs, but we switched and I was so grateful and I tend to feel really bad about switching things up like that. Um, and I'm recording this podcast super late and it's nothing planned and it's super raw, right, so I'm learning all these things. There's a bunch of stuff that should happen for this, right, like I should have had this ready. I should have had this uploaded already and my OBM would have created an email to go out first thing tomorrow morning and audio clips to go up on Instagram. None of that has happened and I need to learn to be okay with that. I have right. So it's so much to consider. It's so much like outside of business to handle.

Speaker 1:

I don't know if y'all have children or not or what the ages of your children are, but having kids who are older my kids are going to be turning 11 and nine soon so it's just a different type of mental and energetic energy that they take, that they require. I don't want to say take from me, but that they require from me. There's a lot of questions, there's a lot of curiosity. There's a lot of wanting to know and explanations and supporting them emotionally and showing up for them, and I love those things. But I'm also learning how now I need to take care of myself back in this season to be able to support them and myself, because when they're little, they're it's different kinds of you know energy that they require from you. We're not having existential crisis conversations and they don't have opinions. They have to follow your flow to a certain extent, and I do think it's also exhausting, don't get me wrong like I had two little ones at the same time, but I don't know if you're a parent of, like a pre-teen and and like new teenager. Like, hit me up, let me know if you're feeling this, if it's resonating with you, because I do think that the energy required to parent and to parent well and to be present, um just requires a different kind of energy. So, yeah, um, I think, I think this is all like.

Speaker 1:

I'm just really raw and open. I'm dealing with physical shit because this infection is still kicking my butt. It's physical things. Back to back, I feel like, and it's also like trying to run this business to the best of my ability and continuing to trust the process in everything I do and reinvent the wheel, kind of as the environment shifts and, you know, finding ways to generate revenue and like really questioning the existence of my life of is this what I'm supposed to be continue doing? I know it's definitely what I'm supposed to be doing, it is my passion, but, like, do I continue doing it in this way? Does it look differently? What does that look like? And the questions are there, but the energy and the clarity and the creativity is not, and that just means I need to continue to care for myself and not beat myself up about it, as I've done way too many times in the past.

Speaker 1:

So I really do invite you to let me know your thoughts, let me know how you're feeling, let me know if this resonates with you, let me know if this is the first time you're hearing of I don't know entrepreneurship going this way, of the whole curation of how to show up or not. Do you tend to do that? Were you conditioned to do that? Right About parenthood or burnout, right, or physical things that are happening? It's just not so easy when everything is happening at once and life just piling on in a sense. So I know I'm doing the work to be and to pivot and to share openly and authentically and that's what I'm doing here, along the same lines I would like to share, because this wasn't even the podcast that I would have created for today, but it's how it came out and I know that it was. It's what it was meant to be.

Speaker 1:

But what I also wanted to share was that I have opened up my three month one on one food and hormone health coaching services. It's open until July 20th, sunday, july 20th and I really want to support you in navigating weight, hormones, cravings, cultural pressures from every direction like a pro. Right. I do want you to delight in wellness that's rooted in flexibility, compassion, culture and what works for you. And what better example, I guess, than what I've just shared today, because I've literally had to be flexible, compassionate and in my culture, because I made myself some soup to help myself in my wellness in this season is not always about hitting the gym and curating perfect meals and all that. It's also about the flexibility of slowing down and giving your body and energy time to heal. You know body and energy, time to heal, you know. So here's a little bit more about the vibe of this journey, with three months in three months of coaching right.

Speaker 1:

No matter what wellness, healing and weight loss tool you choose diets, injections are not at all. You still need a strong foundation, and understanding how food works in your body, building habits, skills and confidence is what makes the results real, healthy and sustainable. It's time to enjoy and delight in your life and body instead of feeling defeated and frustrated, which I have known all too well recently. I am forever grateful for my support systems for supporting me and holding space for me, without judgment, because that's what I'm used to and that's what I'm here to do for you, too. Just give you space and guidance and support without judgment, so we can learn how to redefine weight loss right.

Speaker 1:

Let go of the skill obsession. We'll focus on your reasons, your progress markers and feeling good now, not later. You shouldn't wait for a number on the scale or on your clothes to dictate feeling good right. We can support your hormones from perimenopause to your blood sugar and stress. Your hormones impact everything. Learn how to work with your body to get better results that last and, lastly, live your best life. Feel strong, energized and free in your body again. Build habits that support your life the life you want and hold you back.

Speaker 1:

And if you're like asking yourself if I'm reading from something, yes, yes, I am, because I created all this. It was born out of my brain and I wrote it down because it's posted on Instagram and I have sent newsletters out about this and that's how I wanted to communicate it on here today, because it is cutting my self-grace and flexibility. Y'all see how that works, y'all see. So how do you know? If one-on-one coaching is for you, so it's for you. If you want to try one last time to lose weight your own way, without shame, overwhelm or starting over again, right, let's, let's stop starting over. Let's build that foundation so you can stop starting over and you can just evolve from here. Right?

Speaker 1:

If you're using or considering weight loss injections and want real habits and skills to sustain your wellness long term. So if you have not heard to use these weight loss or consider them using effectively, you also need a whole lifestyle to go along with that. You also need an actual plan Waiting and seeing is not a plan, right Of how to use it so that your health stays well, right and how to maintain your results. If you have decided that you don't want to be on this kind of using this kind of tool for long, long, long, long amount of time. You still must build that foundation. If you have not looked into what is recommended for injection tools, they always recommend eating high protein, starting strength training and adjusting your lifestyle so that you have a more positive experience on this, and that's exactly what I can help you do, because it's not just about what you're eating is also the quality right Like what does it mean? How it's making you feel, so on and so forth.

Speaker 1:

It's also for you if hormones or perimenopause have you feeling disconnected from your body and you're unsure what actually works and is healthy for you anymore, and you're unsure what actually works and is healthy for you anymore. Hormone shifts are no joke. Perimenopause is no joke. There is definitely a way to lose weight and feel better in your body. And again, it goes back to learning that foundation, going back to the research that is female specific, which there's not a lot out there and that I do follow, so that you don't feel defeated and like nothing works. A lot of the research out here is bro bro research and it works for them and it's great, but oftentimes it has us feeling like we're broken and we're not, and I'm here to support you with that.

Speaker 1:

Another thing is you're done with the all or nothing diets and you want sustainable wellness that includes your culture, your joy and your social life. Right, I think this is what people, a lot of people, assume that you cannot enjoy food anymore. You need to let go of cultural meals and habits and things that you do because it's quote, unquote, unhealthy and you can't go out and have a good time anymore, and none of that is true. So like, there's definitely a way to be well and to eat well and to also enjoy your life, because, yeah, that's what we're here for. So, by the end of three months, what will you get? You will get an understanding of how your food, hormones and lifestyle work together. You will learn how to create a rhythm that's flexible, doable and actually feels good, not like fucking torture. You will recognize what's really holding you back and learn how to shift in a wellness journey. You will build a softer, stronger relationship with your body Doesn't that sound lovely? And you'll feel more grounded, energized and in control again, instead of just like flapping in the wind All right. So again, instead of just like flapping in the wind All right.

Speaker 1:

So again, the duration is three months. You get replays. We do the calls on Zoom. You have access to me on WhatsApp whenever you want to text me for continued support, coaching and accountability. I don't want you to feel alone, like you have nobody to talk to. Honestly, having access to my coaches in between our meetings has been a game changer, lifesaver for me, because I send my coach or my healer a seven minute voice now and the investment is $2,555 for the three months. Yes, there are payment plans available. Just hit me up and ask about it, and I currently have six spots open. Okay, so that's the deal. I'm excited to guide you through the journey and help you take control of how you feel, without sacrificing the foods and the life that you love.

Speaker 1:

This program is designed to give you the knowledge, support, tools you need to feel your best so we can do this together. All right, my love, all right, my darling. That's what I called my sugar mamas. Today, I've been liking calling people my darling, my darling. I will let you go. Thank you for listening to like my 40 minute voice note. If you're interested in one-on-one food and hormone health coaching, if you're curious about it, I encourage you to reach out. You can book a free consultation call with the link in the show notes, or you can just send me a DM or a message, wherever you would like an email and we can talk about it. All right, and please, please, please, if any of this resonated with you, if you feel seen, you want to chat or whatever it is, also reach out. All right, I want to connect with you on any of what I shared with you today. All right, I'll see y'all next week. Bye.